where are you, God?

My God, my God, why have you abandoned me?
      Why are you so far away when I groan for help?
Every day I call to you, my God, but you do not answer.
      Every night you hear my voice, but I find no relief.
Yet you are holy,
      enthroned on the praises of Israel. (Psalm 22:1-3)

Things happen to you and people say where is your God now? And you have to say, I do not know.

The psalmist felt this in his cry to God. Stuff is happening that is bad, that hurts not only me but my whole family. Where are you? Why is this happening? Where are the promises you made to me so long ago? Where are you?

Jesus felt it, too, on the cross when he cried out to God, Why have you abandoned me? even though he knew the reason for it all, he felt so keenly the absence of God in his life. His human side screamed, Wait! I didn’t know it would be like this! His divine side said, Your will be done.

But the human side felt it. God was nowhere around. He was not there.

The psalmist felt the same way. Where is God? Where are you? I need you and you are far away. I call on you every day and you never hear.

David was obviously going through some tough times and he needed God and God was not there for him. He was there for God, but God was not there for hi.

Job was the same. He needed God, but God was passively watching, along with the Devil, to see how Job was going to do in trouble. God knew, of course, but he wanted satan to see it.

But in the meantime, Job was hurting on a level that it is hard to understand. He had lost everything for no good reason. His wife was hurting too, and saw his pain, and all she could think to do was encourage him to go ahead and curse God and get it over with.

Where is God? Where was he when David cried out? Where was he when Jesus cried out? Where was he when Job cried out? Where is he when I cry out?

I am not in the same spiritual league as David, Jesus and Job. I know that. But if he knows each of us enough to count the hairs on our heads (Luke 12:7), then he knows what we need. And he could answer us.

So what is the point of standing around watching us and knowing we need him so badly? Why wait? Why not keep the promises he made in our lives so long ago?

In Jeremiah 29:11, he says: For I know the plans I have for you,” says the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.” When will they come? How old do I have to be before they start? Have I sinned so much, is my sin so great that he cannot work through it?

And even if it is, what about my wife? She is good on a level I could never hope to be. She is holy. And she shares the problems I have. She has to. She is trapped in my world. What about her. Did he make no plans for her? Does he not care about her.? Could he not bless her somehow and bypass me? Is the Lord of the Universe so unimaginative that he cannot figure out how to help her and leave me alone, if I am so sinful?

We need you, God. We are desperate for you, as the song says.

Yet I know that you are holy. And when I sing praises to you, I know that you are in them. I can feel your presence. You live in my praise.

But why do the other things happen and we become impoverished, we remain without a car and the means to buy one? We have food, for sure. You have blessed us with food overflowing as a result of our generosity to others with it.

But we are about to have no home in which to put the refrigerator with the food, or to have a place to feed people.

You have given me dreams of helping others. The dreams of that stupid coffeehouse that for some reason you will not allow me to let go of. The dreams of empowering young people to answer your in their music. The dreams of feeding crowds, of helping young people find you and find themselves in you. The dreams of teaching and guiding.

Were they pipe dreams? Am I really a free-lance fool who just happens to be working for you right now?

I am a lousy pastor, but I love your church. And I am a sinful man, but I love you. Why have you never allowed me to find my place? I am growing older and will soon be too old to effectively serve you. Yet I still wait.

Why? Why have you forsaken me?